Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Knock Knock

For those that don't know me, I was raised by a single mother. I've often referred to her as my Fadre (father and madre mixed together). All my life, I've known that when it came time for me to be a Dad, I was going to stay away from the mistakes and choices of my father. I was going to be a DAD to my child. Whether it be a son or a daughter, I was going to be the best Dad I could be. This is to all those single mothers, and to all the REAL Fathers who have earned the right to be called DAD.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Honor Them

The eleventh hour on the eleventh day of the eleventh month. That's Veterans Day in the United States. In lands faraway, men and women have given their lives for our rights to freedom in this country. Being a Veteran, today has been and always will be a solemn day for me. I still have friends in the service. My family has a deep history of serving. My dad was in the Navy, my grandpa served in the Coast Guard, Army, and Air Force. Many other cousins, aunts, and uncles have served as well.

Today, please take a minute to go online and find a forum for veterans and say thank you, or go out into town and I'm sure you will come across someone with a hat or shirt or jacket showing they are a Veteran. Take a moment and thank them for their service.

I would also like to throw a shoutout to the people on twitter who make sure that veterans and troops are always aware that they are supported. @americanwomann @slkbrooke @autsmama98 @beanies4baghdad @cupcakes5 @WOTN2 @carsonjdaly @CSUMB_otters @reenit @armymom101 @centerright @shelley_rae @da_nennett @rashadhouston @alizziegal and soooo many others. If you are on twitter, do a search for the following hastags to see just how many people support our troops and veterans. #honorvets #militarymon #sot #veteran #military #Navy, #USMC #Army #Airforce #coastguard

Happy Veterans Day everyone! "some gave all, and all gave some" "If you aren't willing to stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them"

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

A Video that rocked my mind

Wow, it's been a while since I last updated. As you all know, being the nice guy is all about being a servant, and treating people as you would want to be treated. It also means being eternally optimistic. The first video I wanted to share is about a man named Nick Vujicic. the title of the video is Are you going to finish strong? Enjoy!

Well, if you ever think your life sucks... Whenever I think my life sucks, it's time for a swift kick to the ass, and a reminder that as long as i wake up in the morning on the right side of the grass, I have nothing to complain about.

This video was quite impressive, and had a profound impact on me. I hope you all enjoy it and learn from it as I did.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

I was once a "cantgetright"

Yep, that's right. When I first joined the Navy, my supervisors gave me the given name of "cantgetright" Meaning, no matter how much I tried, how much I knew, I just couldn't get right. Boy I really messed stuff up the first year I was on board my ship.

The Nice Guy had a rough first year aboard ship. One of my friends from home passed away while I was deployed to the persian gulf. Unfortunately, we had a falling out, and I said some really horrible things to her before I left. I never had the chance to apologize to her for the things I said.

There have been other times in my life where Justin "cantgetright" Iiams has fallen on his face and received some serious road rash. in 2005 I tried to start my own business selling printer cartridges. yeah, that was a serious failure.

In 2006, I went through a really mean divorce in which things were said on both sides, and relationships with friends and family were strained or broken. It was a very dark time in my life. I didn't like the person I was (I turned into my nemesis AKA The Badass Mean Guy), and I had no clue where I was going.

I've had thousands of failures in my life..... But here's the thing: Benjamin Frankling once said that he didn't fail 10,000 times trying to invent the lightbulb. He simply found 10,000 ways NOT to make it.

I watched the Micheal J. Fox documentary on TLC today, and the title was "Adventures of the Eternal Optimist". He said that failure isn't a bad thing. Life shouldn't come easy, otherwise it wouldn't be fun. This is a man with Parkinsons Disease, who was Teenwolf, Marty McFly, and the deputy mayor on Spin City. He's always been one of my favorite actors, and heres the reason why. No matter what life throws at him, he just shrugs it off and takes another step forward. He's the kind of guy who if given lemons, would add vodka and have a hard lemonade.

Every single time I get the "cantgetright" vibes, I think of two people. Michael J. Fox and Jimmy V who gave the "Don't give up, Don't ever give up" speech. Heres the video in case you want to watch.

So here's the bottom line. You can choose to wallow in self pity and say "woes me" OR, you can get back up, dust your shoulders off, and choose to be "CANGETRIGHT". I choose GETRIGHT and I choose to make sure failures become successes. I wish you all the best and hope you choose "Cangetright" over "Cantgetright".

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Why Dogs Stick their head out the car window

I'm a spiritual guy. religious.... meh. I believe in Jesus, and I believe in God. I am quite jaded by churches though. I believe in Fellowship, communion, and spending time with people who have like values and beliefs.

With that, I was introduced to Law of Attraction by my boss about four months ago. I have listened intently, and found that these teachings are very powerful, and usually find me on the right day at the right time, right when I need them. Today was an incredible example of that happening. Here's the video to show you what I mean. The last minute of the video is what I needed to hear.

Currently, I am one year into college, one year into being a dad, about to take a step up in the company that I work for, and in doing all of this, I have been scared shitless (sorry, sailors gotta tell it like it is). I have found that the reward is SO incredibly worth it. Going through college is hard! The University of Phoenix isn't an easy place to study. I am damn proud of going back to school and working towards my Bachelors degree though.

I am proud to be a dad. My baby boy (pictured right with me) has been the greatest blessing I could have ever asked for. He has been saying "Dada" for a few months, and has just recently starting just saying "Dad". He is the joy of my life, and the reason I strive to be a better man. My stepkids keep me on my toes, and make me push to be a better man, and symbol of how a Man should treat his Wife, and how being a Dad is the coolest job in the world.

My wife pushes me (sometimes a little harder than I want, but exactly how hard I need) to be the better man, father, and husband. Sometimes we don't see eye to eye. Other times, my view is in the clouds, and hers is at sea level. However, these happen so very rarely.

I give these contrasts to show that in my life, I do get "bugs in my eyes" BUT, the journey, oh the Journey is soooo worth it!

Being woken up in the middle of the night by a crying baby. pfft, that's nothing compared to the smile I get when I get home and he sees me and smiles and puts his arms out for me to hold him. My stepkids who were particularly mean to me when their mom and I got together. Yeah, that was like getting a bumble bee and not a mosquito. However, over the past few years, that bumblebee is nothing compared to the fun ride it has been with my stepkids.

Spending a whole weekend working on a paper and not being able to spend time with my family, yeah that sucks. However, I do know that in the past year, I have improved my education, and advanced myself to more opportunities at a great job with great pay, and a great environment. in fact, The job I have now is in direct result to going to school. My boss wanted someone who knew what they wanted and were willing to work to get it.

So here's the bottom line... In life, you are going to get hit in the face with a bug or hundreds depending on how fun the ride is. But really, quit stressing, get the tooth pick out, take the bug guts out of your teeth, wipe off your face and keep reminding yourself... The bugs are well worth the ride!!!

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Why nice guys love superman

January 2006
Why nice guys love superman
Every one knows the nice guy. He is the one who comes over to your house when your boyfriend cheats on you. He is the one who sat and watched the chick flick with you cuz your boyfriend wouldn't. HE is the one who would treat you like a queen if he was ever given the chance. Unfortunately, the nice guys are always beaten out by the "Villain"

The villain is the "bad boy" who does what he wants and walks over women like it is his God given right. He is the one who time and again has the "ass on the side" and never feels guilty for being unfaithful. It is him who makes the good guys hate being so nice. It is the villain that always gets the woman. And it is always the nice guy who gets left home alone.

Sure, the nice guy has many friends, but what about a companion? How many times has he worked up the balls to ask that someone out just to hear "I think we are better off as friends", or "our friendship means a lot to me and I don't want to ruin that with a relationship". Those two responses are often more painful than a kick to the balls for the nice guy. And, whatever happened to the saying that friends make the best lovers?

The world reads playboy, cosmo, vogue, and all the other magazines that talk about men and women. In fact, the most common qualities wanted in a man by playmates: Caring, Nice, Romantic, and the most common... LOYALTY. So, this begs the question. If these are the qualities that women want, then why do they go to the bad boy? The most incredible thing is that once those women get the caring, nice, romantic and loyal man, they are the ones who cheat!

A friend once told me that she gets bored after a couple months of dating a guy. She said it wasn't the guys fault at all. It was the chase that she loved. This leaves me extremely perplexed. If the women want a nice guy but also want the chase, how does a guy get a woman he wants, but more importantly, how does he keep her? But, is it all worth the hassle? MAYBE one day I will figure that one out.

So, I have come to the conclusion that being a nice guy is like being superman. Superman is always trying to do the right thing. He just somehow always is overlooked, or no one just cares to say "thank you". The nice guy has the super human ability to endure heartbreak time and time again. He has the super power to be trampled on, used and abused, and still come back for more. Superman often thought that his powers were a curse. In the same fashion, being a nice guy is like a curse. AND, when the nice guy finally gives up and tries to be a bad boy, he either fails miserably, or he succeeds in being a jerk, using friends, but ultimately hates this so much he goes back to being the nice guy. So, being in the Catch 22, what does a nice guy do to get the woman he deserves?

The answer is to not worry about finding a woman. She will come when it is time. Focus now on the more important things. Get an education so you can earn more money than the people who were just pretty and will rely on their T&A and bubbly smile. Don't worry about that guy in high school whose daddy spoiled them rotten, but picked on you to make himself feel better. Don't dwell on the people who made your life bad in high school. They are bullets to a gun that will help you shoot down obstacles before your ten year reunion. Once you get to your ten year, show all those bimbos and jerks that you weren't just the nice guy, but you are now the MSG (More Successful Guy)
But, this wouldn't be complete without actually thanking those dipshits who made you unhappy. They are the reason why you will be successful. Thank that woman who cheated on you! Thank that guy who used to throw apples at you!! They are the drive in my life. They are the reason why I will be better at everything than they are. Just like Lex Luthor made life hell for superman, those people will make life hell for you. They are your drive, Lex is superman’s drive.

So, THANK YOU to all those people who shat on me. You are the reason I will be better in my life. Thank you Lex Luthor for making superman my hero.

For all of you going through a rough patch in your lives, whether it be in high school, your 20’s, 30’s, and on, it will be over one day. My youth pastor in high school said that sometimes you just gotta “keep on keepin on”. There is no harm in using your aggressions towards goals. Don’t let the other people win and be mad at them. Focus on your future, and better yourself.
Remember, “be nice to the nerds, they will one day be your boss”- Bill Gates